Posts tagged ‘Pre-Cana’

December 17, 2009

Pre-cana…what does that even mean?

Well my friends, last weekend we  survived pre-cana (i.e. drivers’ ed for engaged Catholic–or half-Catholic–couples).  No one bothered to tell us what that translated too, but today’s google search informed me that the name derives from John 2:1-12, the wedding feast at Cana in Galilee, where Jesus turned water into wine.

No one turned water into wine at pre-cana.

Instead we sat with almost 50 other young couples who were about as happy as we were to be spending all day Saturday at St. Matthew’s.

We started with the FOCCUS, and I have no idea what that stands for either, but it’s just a questionnaire that asks your preferences on general things and you state “agree,” “disagree,” or “uncertain.” My favorites include “My future spouse watches too much television” and “I worry about the homosexual tendencies of my future spouse.”

After that we introduced ourselves to the two couples at our table (one of which may or may not have been a green-card marriage, as he told us he proposed right before he was about to be shipped back to Britain because he couldn’t find a job here).  From there we sat through several long talks about communication, conflict resolution, finances, and, of course, the infamous natural family planning (I especially enjoyed watching the woman at the next table, who kept rolling her eyes and shaking her head at that part). 

For all the time we spent there, I don’t feel like we really learned anything. For the most part, it was common sense. I think I was expecting more, some secret sacred knowledge of the Catholics that had been passed down by generations…but nope, it was just a long seminar based on “facts” and “research” from the same two “scientists” these speakers loved. And everything was so absolute! It’s like these speakers couldn’t imagine a world where things weren’t black and white. My favorite part was when one speaker asked, “If you’re in an interfaith relationship, which religion will you teach your children?” Um, you can’t teach both? They seemed so misguided.

But the strangest part of the whole thing was that every one of the speakers was a convert. EVERY ONE. Could they not find any homegrown Catholics willing to waste a Saturday for this thing? I don’t get it.

Well, there’s your update. Our Catholic marriage workshop is over and done with, and it really wasn’t so bad. And at least no one asked if we were living together.

 K & P, enjoy your pre-cana! I found out that some people have to go to a weekend-long retreat…yikes! I hope that’s not you guys!